the reality of strong women

while some guys will have no issue training (or working or studying) with a girl, for some it is a new experience. of the ones who need to get used to the idea, there are two types. the first type falls in the my-training-partner-has-boobs-what-do-I-do category. they generally just need to get over the fact that they are training with a girl and realize they are just training with another person who has their own strengths and weaknesses just like any other training partner. of course, it’s much easier to deal with this first type. you just have to continue being yourself and doing your best and they will soon overcome any apprehension they had about training/working with someone of the opposite sex.

the second type is a little more tricky, they are just not prepared to deal with the type of woman who trains/studies/works in an male dominated environment. they have preconceived ideas of how women should behave and often this is not in line with the reality of women in male dominated fields. the fact of the matter is that women who have been in male dominated fields for an extended length of time are necessarily assertive and straightforward. sometimes it is, and sometimes it is mistaken for, being abrasive and curt (I make no apologies for being this way. in my years working with men, I have found that they respond to strength*). some guys just have no idea how to deal with strong women since they have never met one. some will even lash out at us. it’s only human nature to fear the unknown, and we all know it’s also human nature to try to destroy what we fear. to deal with this second type, you just have to let them deal with their own uncomfortableness. try to work/train as peaceably as possible, but give them their distance. there’s nothing you can do. they fear you, you are a threat to their reality. do not change for them and do not make apologies.

*sure, some women I know are successful playing up the soft and feminine, and while I can respect that, it’s just not my style.

2 thoughts on “the reality of strong women

  1. Kunoichi Terminator says:

    There are many definitions for success. A soft man can be successful too, not limited to female. The most important is to fit your own style.There are two kinds of female ninja; one is fighting; another is sexual. Both are useful.

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